Our TTC Journey

After reading so many TTC blogs I really wish I had started this one when we were still trying.  I would love to have been able to look back over that now that we are here with our beautiful daughter:)  It all began in December 2006 when I proposed to Ciara.  According to her how I proposed was that I told her I wanted to get married and have a baby and that if she wasn't up for it then she was welcome to leave.  I of course do not remember this happening when I actually gave her the ring (or that I told her she was welcome to leave) but I'm sure some version of this did happen shortly after.  The original plan was to get married in the Spring of 08 and start trying to have a baby shortly after.  Before the year ended I had decided we were moving things up because I wanted to a spring 08 baby and that meant we were getting married that June.  Luckily for me Ciara was a good sport and went along with my plan:)

I started some loose charting in Dec/Jan (I did perfect this with computerized software later as you can see) and we started looking for our donor.  We found the perfect one and were put on a wait list.  We were told it could take up to a year for a specimen to become available so when we got a call in February that there were vials available we 

jumped on it.  The plan had been that we would store them until we began trying right after the wedding...but we couldn't wait and by April we were going for our first try.  We had done a small amount of research but I was pretty sure Tyler (not what you would call planned) was proof  that I was extremely fertile and all we would have to do was insert the little swimmers and voila I would be pregnant.  By this time I was recording symptoms and temping and using ovulation kits to help us time when we would do the insemination.  The first cycle we did three inseminations at home - but I think we actually missed the day I O'd.  I was so certain that I was pregnant I started testing at 8dpo.  The first few days I was convinced it was just too early and I continued to try to find more sensitive tests that would pick up the HCG I was sure my body was creating.  With each day that I became more obsessed and spent more time "researching" on the internet.  One day I was sure I had so many pregnancy symptoms that I jumped up off the computer to go and test again...when I found I had run out I went right to the pharmacy to buy myself a test.

When the second try didn't work we went to a fancy fertility clinic for the third.  We had a not 

so great experience there and paid about $600 just for the IUI.  Because we were less than thrilled with the people there and because we were paying for everything out of pocket with a little more research I was convinced we could do the IUI's at home.  Each month we learned a little bit more and added a little bit

 more.  While we continued to try at home I added to our arsenal ovulation kits that smiled when you were surging(I even have a pic because I posted them to TTC boards I was on), a ferning microscope, cervix gazing (my least favorite because we were both HORRIBLE at it), pre.seed, a fertility monitor, IUI catheters, and Cl.omid.  The end of July (our fifth cycle) we had a midwife come to the home and train Ciara how to do the IUI correctly.  

For those of you who know me IRL you know that I can get slightly obsessive about things (prime example: the slight stalking of elementary school crushes TEN years after the fact).  Like many people I have encountered in the virtual world I have been sucked in during this journey TTC consumed my world.  After the IUI with the midwife did not work we got a prescription for Cl.omid and I tried that for two more cycles with no luck.  Cl.omid made me into a scary MOODY person and was not particularly fun!!!  During my TWW of our seventh cycle I found a clinic that did minimal stim IVF.  This procedure cost about the same as a medicated and monitored cycle of IUI at the fancy clinic (we went back for a second consultation after try #6).  When I met with the doctor at the new smaller friendlier wonderful clinic he said he could do minimal stim IVF with me but was almost certain he could get me pregnant with a medicated and monitored cycle (that cost about two thousand less than the other clinic).

So in October I stopped charting (could not have been happier about that!!!!!!) and put 

myself into the hands of the new little clinic.  I started with Cl.omid and then added injections of G.onal F (only four days of injections if I remember correctly) and then did an HCG trigger.  After the insemination they gave me progesterone suppositories.  On November 4, 2007 we got our BFP!!!!!!  

While eight months felt like an eternity to me I know there are some who would have loved to be able to say it worked on their eighth try.  And of course I would do it ALL over again in a heartbeat to get this....

                                                

Lexi's Birth Story

I loved Ciara's idea of going back and putting down our history.  It gives us one place where we have all of our stories together so here is my contribution for the day/night.  

We actually had a very good experience with our birth!!! It sort of started Sunday night. I started having contractions that weren't too painful but they started at about 10 minutes apart and after about four hours they were about a minute and a half apart...but I could still walk and talk through them. Our practice said we should go in and get checked out so we went into L&D and I was checked and I was 0 cm and 0 effaced. The nurse said we could walk or just go home...so we decided to go home. When we were leaving she said "Ok see you next week."

Monday we slept (we got home around 6 am and slept till about noon - Ty was luckily with my parents for a sleepover). We spent the night trying to get the contractions to "do something" with no luck. We went over to my parents house around 8:30 to have dessert, play dominoes, and hang out with Ty who was going to stay with them until our little one came. I started having the same type of contractions not too painful but fairly consistently about 5-7 minutes apart. When we got home we decided to try to go to sleep because we were both exhausted after the night before and didn't have the energy to walk and time, especially if nothing was going to happen.

So around midnight I took my Benadryl (the secret to me sleeping during the third trimester) and we went to sleep. I woke up a couple of times to use the bathroom and noticed that I was still having contractions and that they were getting more painful. At 2 am the contractions woke me up and I was definitely not able to walk and talk through them. I tried to get through them for a while on my own (ciara was EXHAUSTED so I thought I’d let her sleep). The contractions were about three minutes apart and lasting only about 30 seconds. I tried breathing through them and taking a bath. After an hour we called the advice line and they said they were shorter than they would like but closer together....so she paged the doctor. She called back and said the doctor wanted us to go in so he could check my cervix. I was just starting to figure out how to get through the contractions and was thinking it might be nice to labor at home for a little while longer...but we decided we would go ahead and go in since it is a thirty minute drive.

By the time I got there I was having a lot of trouble breathing through the contractions and they felt like they were getting closer together. All I could think about was getting my epidural and I was hoping I was close to 4cm so they would admit me and let me get one. We went through the check in procedures which went very quickly since we had been there the night before (which actually was nice because I certainly could not have answered all of those questions). Before the nurse went to get the doctor to check me Ciara asked if she thought I would be staying. She looked at the print out and said she was pretty sure I would be admitted but that we would see. The doctor came very quickly (the last time we waited an hour and the doctor just sent the nurse instead). When he checked he said i was EIGHT centimeters and that he could stretch me to nine!!!!!

After that everything went into what felt like hyper speed mode. We had checked in at 4:00am. I was GBS+ and wanted an epidural so they got me into a room and started my IV. We called my parents and the photographer to let them know and have the photographer come over. They got me hooked up to the Epidural and I had some relief but I was still feeling a lot of pain/pressure. The nurse was so sweet and was sitting with me trying to get me through the contractions but also trying to get her paperwork done (there were two others helping her because everything had gone so fast). She was kidding around and asked me to just hold off until she finished but with each contraction she looked more nervous because I kept feeling pain and pressure and said I thought I might be feeling like i needed to push. She got the doctor again and sure enough I was 10 centimeters. My water hadn’t broken and the doctor asked if I thought I could hold off a half an hour more because with the GBS they really like to run the antibiotics for two hours. He stayed in the room with me and was talking with the nurse and Ciara and after two or three contractions with them watching my face he said I should go ahead and he would have me push and see what happened.He was checking stuff and having me push a little and my water broke. So he said we would go ahead and set up for delivery. Our photographer walked in just as I was about to start the first push so she made it just in time....With the first contraction they could see her hair, and with the second one she was out!!!!!! She was born at 5:45 am, weighed 6 pounds 11 ounces, and was 20 inches long.

(I added a link to the blog of the photographer we used and LOVE for our wedding, maternity, and birth photos so people can check her out - she rocks - and here's the slideshow she created!!!)

Our Story - Part 1 (How we Began Ciara's point of view)

Let see where to start....First Online love really happens. I feel like all the Eharmony or Match stuff is a little more marketing and not enough real life. Yet in the case of myself and my future wife we were quite the online love match.  We didn't decide to get together for coffee or lunch

 for several months. I guess I wasn't as smooth of a talker as I thought.  Little did I know she had other things going on. Our first encounter before we really started the dating thing was when I saw her at the JC ( what we called the student hang out area).  I later emailed her and she told me that she was a grad student at the same school I went to.  Still no getting together. Later down the road I started working as a bartender at a local Lesbian Bar and guess who walks in to my bar. Good ole Megan.   She was looking a little out of place.  Megan has a young look to her which is really great when she is 

40 and she looks 23, but at a bar not so good. I thought she was underage and had snuck in. Anyway, she asked one of my co-workers about me and one thing lead to another. 

 

As I said before she had a few things going on in her life, such as a little toddler at home.  Boy was he a cutie pie.  After that night we talked and she told me a lot of things about herself and I did the same. When she told me about the little guy I thought dating was out but we could be good friends.  She later allowed me to meet her young son. I fell in Love with him ASAP! He was full of energy and was very funny. I'm a sucker for charming little kids. Our friendship later become are love story. Crazy I know but I now  have the Dream wife and family. Who can ask for more?